The __ Year Old Virgin

I’ll let you decide what numbers should go in the blank here…

Well, after years of consideration, hesitation, weighing the odds, checking out the possibilities and considering all the options, I finally got over my fears and just did it. And do I feel much better now that it’s finally over! Yes folks, today, for the first time, I used my brand new, first ever, monthly bus pass. No more bus tickets for me! No more fumbling for exact change, and no more weighing whether to cut a trip short because the transfer will expire in exactly __ minutes. Complete freedom to cruise the public transit system! Wow… nothing like it, I gotta tell you Leaves me a little breathless just thinking about it…

So, to celebrate (and to break in the pass) we decided to go all out and do something really big.  Since we do live on an island, big is a relative term. In the end we decided to go to Sidney. Note: that’s Sidney, not Sydney, because for us to go to Sydney with a bus pass would require something akin to Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, only on steroids.

Sidney by the Sea is just north of here, and pretty close to the end of our municipal transit system. It’s also a wonderful little town of around 11,000 people, on the eastern shore of the island. The lumber mill, the cannery and the traditional industries are gone, but Sidney has revitalized itself. There’s a wonderful walkway along the ocean with a couple of small beaches (a little windy for swimming though, this being December and all) as well as the Shaw Ocean Discovery Centre. In our short, first trip to Sidney we made some photographs, discovered some funky little shops and a couple of great art galleries, but our first impressions are that Sidney should be noted for two things:

  1. Coffee Shops. I wouldn’t say there’s a coffee shop/ café/ espresso bar on every corner, but it certainly seems like it. We lost count after the first four or five, and that didn’t include the bakery/ chocolate shop that also has coffee, tea, etc. We sampled two. The first one literally drew us in because of the scent of roasting coffee drifting down the street. Our senses were assailed, and our bodies (willingly) followed. Welcome to the Fresh Cup Roastery. They have very good cinnamon buns there, but ask for two forks because you’re partner will want to share. Later in the day we stopped at the Red Brick Café for lunch. The Red Brick Café is all about comfort food – homemade soups, salads, sandwiches, good tea, and a comfortable atmosphere. Both places are very good, but the next time we go to Sidney we’ll have to try some new places.
  2. Bookstores. Sidney sells itself as a booktown and with good reason. There are at least a dozen different bookstores in Sidney, selling both new and used books, magazines, ephemera, maps, etc. We didn’t make it to all of them, but not for lack of trying. Bookstores are addictive for us. The last time we moved we had 35 boxes of books, and that was only because we’d pared down quite a few. It was with GREAT self control that we brought home only one book, a first Canadian edition of ‘The Voyage of the Stella’ by R.D. Lawrence. I couldn’t list a favourite bookstore, however, and since we’ll have forgotten which ones we did get to by the time we get to Sidney again, we’ll just have to visit them all again! (heavy sigh).

Speaking of books, and before my brain starts to leak out all over the floor, I’m going to close this post with a passage from the book ‘Waking in Dreamland’ by Jody Lynn Nye (Baen Publishing Enterprises, pp.255-257):

“”Uh-oh,” the senior historian said, despair in his voice. “We’re in trouble now.”

“Do you see Brom?” Roan asked, squinting into the crowd.

“No, it’s worse,” Bergold said. “Look. It’s a bookstore. A big one.”

“Oh, no!”

Roan stared up at the brightly colored sign hanging over the sidewalk only twenty yards ahead. A bookstore! It was the biggest hazard of any town. What could they do? The route they needed to take to the market led directly past it. He made as if to turn back and lead them on a more circuitous route, when the expandable aura of pleasure and joyful anticipation the bookstore exuded engulfed him. The smell of coffee wafted past his nose He rotated on his heel, facing the bright sign again, his mind clouding.

How nice it would be, he thought, just to browse for a while, perhaps sit and drink a cup of coffee and read . . . No! What was he thinking? He was on an important mission! He had to save the Dreamland! Perhaps there were how-to books on heroism in the Sociology section . . .

The others were falling under the spell too. The pupils of Leonora’s green eyes spread across the irises as she stared at the sign. Bergold was shifting his shoulder bag as if to judge whether there’d be some room in it for a volume or two. They all moved a step closer, and had the opposite foot raised to take the next step. Roan tugged them back, and the spell broke momentarily.

“This must be a very good store,” Leonora said, clasping her hands around Roan’s upper arm. “I can feel the urge from here. Hold on to me or I’ll fall in.”

“So will I,” Bergold said. “We’ve got to help one another.”

The urge to go inside was overwhelmingly powerful. The siren call of the books was such a loud howling in his ears that Roan put his hands up to stop them. Leonora put her head down against his shoulder, her eyes screwed shut. If they fell into the bookstore, they’d be trapped for hours, pulled along by sheer curiosity to scan every title, or draw an especially tempting book off the shelf and read, lulled by a hypnotic, lazy atmosphere to forget about the cares of the outside world. Their cause would be lost.

Roan felt himself moving forward again, his feet moving of their own volition on the pavement. Stop! he thought at them. Stop! They could not afford to lose the day. Brom was near; Roan could sense it.  The Dreamland, he had to think of the Dreamland, and the threat of the Alarm Clock! But no, his feet refused to pass, started to turn in towards the doorway.

“We’ll all join arms,” Roan said, taking Colenna’s elbow. She attached herself to Spar. Bergold took Leonora’s other arm, and Misha held on to him. “We’ll run across quickly. That way, we won’t get sucked inside.”

“Hold tight,” Lum said, as the other guards linked arms. “Ready?”

“Ready!” Bergold said. They were within inches of the glass-and-green-paneled doors. The pull was so strong. “One, two, three, go!

Roan launched himself forward. As the group hurled themselves past the doorway, they caught the full brunt of the attraction.

Succumb, the wordless song said. You know you want to. Everything else can wait. The smell of coffee tantalized, cushions beckoned, the bright colours danced, book blurbs whispered in their ears.  Roan nearly hesitated in mid-dash. He could feel the others faltering.

“Help,” Colenna moaned.

“Right, then,” Spar said, stoutly. As usual, the guard captain seemed unaffected by the unseen forces that paralyzed everyone else. Spar marched firmly to the other side of the bookstore entrance, pulling his end of the line of people with him. He set his heels against a paving stone, and heaved. The others came flying toward him like corks out of a bottle. Roan stumbled to a halt, trying to cushion Leonora from running into the wall. He panted with exertion, a bead of sweat running down into his eyes. Felan stood, gasping.

“There, now, you’re safe,” Spar said, putting an arm around Colenna. “Are you all right? My lady?”

Colenna leaned on his arm with a wordless smile, and Leonora nodded.

“My gratitude, Captain,” Roan said. His throat felt dry from the cappuccino fumes.

“All part of the job,” Spar said. He tucked Colenna’s hand into his elbow, and marched forward, his spine proudly erect.

It was only a little easier to walk away from the entrance than it had been to resist walking toward it.  All around them on the street were dozens of others without the captain’s iron self-control. Roan feared for them. Some were clinging to lampposts, fire hydrants, and each other, in an attempt to resist. A woman, innocently walking a poodle on the other side of the street, was swept up by the seductive force and carried helplessly inside, the dog yelping behind her.

“It could have been us,” Felan said, sadly, watching her sail past.

“Come on,” Roan said, striding forward. “We shouldn’t tarry. It could pull us back.”

The outside wall of the bookstore was full of small glass display windows. In the case just ahead of him, Roan noticed a title out of the corner of his eye, and turned his head to see. “The Book of Love,” the gaudy cover read. A good omen, Roan thought, squeezing the princess’ hand in the crook of his arm. He continued to step purposefully forward, then had a sudden and irresistible urge to see the author’s name. He stopped in front of the window. The title was perfectly clear, but the bottom of the book was fuzzy, as if someone had smeared soap across it. He started to put his hand through the glass of the window to open the cover and read the title page, when a cry startled him, and the glass turned invincibly solid. He snatched back his hand.

“Come on,” Bergold called. “The bookshop’s just eaten another pedestrian!”

“Don’t go back,” Leonora pleaded, holding on to him.

Now I’ll never know, he thought.”

*Don’t say I didn’t warn you!

Mike.

P.S. As both a photographer and a writer, books are important to me. One of the best ways to be a better photographer is to look at the works of others. I’m not talking about ‘how-to’ books; those have their place, but by looking at books of photographs you have the opportunity to ask yourself important questions, like “Do I like this photograph? Why or why not? What does it say to me? What does it say about me? What’s the lighting, the composition, the colour, the form, the shape of it?” When I was a clerk in the camera section of a department store, there was another clerk who worked part-time there but full-time as a photo technician for the Armed Forces. He taught me a lot about photography, but one of the most important things I remember is that the first visceral reaction to an image is the most important. We can go back and look at an image for minutes or hours, analyze the structure and the focus points and the technical aspects but what we see in the first 1/2 second or so is vital. Listen to that. Learn the feel of it. Use it in your own work.

As a writer, the same ideas apply, even though the medium is different. Looked at differently, words are simply graphic arrangements of symbols on a page. It’s the particular arrangement of these symbols that give their meaning. To be a better writer, read lots of books from many different people. Look at the structure of their sentences, and the pictures painted by their words, but also go with the same visceral response you get when reading. Skim the page and ask yourself, ‘How does this make me feel? Why?’ Your answers, your reactions are what’s important here.

Journey’s End

One minute before midnight, Saturday November 28th, 2009. Exactly one month to the minute that I have spent every waking moment thinking of, planning for, contemplating, jotting concepts and ideas on sticky notes, and living the life of characters outside the realm of my own reality. I have felt their pain, heard their cries, laughed at their humour, been challenged by their limitations and been awed by their amazingly powerful, multi-dimensional spirits. They have filled me up and consumed my every thought word and deed for twenty-eight straight days and nights. Four complete weeks of total and utter absorption in something other than me and my own life – often even to the exclusion of my husband who has so recently joined me here in Victoria after so long an absence between us.

Today I completed the project to which I have dedicated these many hours, days and weeks. The goal was to write a novel. The commitment was to make that novel a minimum of 50,000 words. I made that commitment and kept it. I not only met it, I exceeded it by 2,855 additional words. The majority of my day today was dedicated to the final two chapters. Forty-two chapters in total, plus an Epilogue, shall one day fill a book with the story that has unfolded before my own eyes and to the amazement of even my own creativity.

I laughed often at my own foolishness as I would sit here at my computer with the intention of taking my characters to certain places, or giving them specific opportunities or introducing them to new concepts in very controlled and guided ways – my ways. The laughter would erupt from me because, like a child, each character had his or her own idea as to what they wanted to do, where they wanted to go, who they wanted to meet or with whom to interact. My suggestions that they behave in certain ways was immediately overruled in favour of their own perceived objectives and they went where they wanted and did what they pleased, in spite of me. Yes, it made me laugh to think of my own foolishness to believe that I had any power at all in the revelation of this tale that took on a life of its own.

After such loving, joyful, sometimes painful and always touching interaction with these beautiful characters that became real within this story, I wrote the last of their adventure today. At precisely 6pm PST in Victoria, British Columbia, Canada, I, Marcia Mae Nelson Pedde typed the magical words The End upon the page before me. A novel had come to a finale. There was resolve, revelation, learning, and immense potential for the future. Mystery was unveiled, issues dealt with and there was closure.

The next phase of my role in this journey is the editing – structural and fundamental recovery of lousy prose, horrid punctuation, and improvement to the grammar. What was written as an introductory chapter I already know is going to have to be totally overhauled. As I mentioned earlier here, the story line I initially intended as I began this novel took on a life of its own and went in an entirely different direction. As a result the first chapter has the prime characters living and acting in places and ways that were no longer effective for them in the new roles the characters themselves wanted to experience.

Does this sound odd to you? If you are an artist in any medium, you will likely understand exactly what occurred to me through this creative journey.

Yet my prime reason for writing tonight is that after all that has occurred today, I’m feeling sad – maybe even a little lonely. This day was filled to the brim writing over 4000 words. I finished the novel, submitting it to the Nanowrimo.org website for word count and validation. My joy and exhilaration generated through an amazing feat of loving commitment was shared with my husband, family and other supporters who journeyed with me through all of this. The high of it all, the pride, has been replaced this evening with a sense of emptiness. My characters have gone to bed. They sleep. They’ve earned that rest, having worked long and hard for it. So have I.

However, rest eludes me. I miss them all. Their chatter in my head is gone. The voices are silent. Their planning, scheming and laughter no longer fill my mind; no longer spew out from my fingers on to the computer screen.

I come to the computer this evening to write. The muscles must remain exercised – even if it is merely those in my fingers and between my ears – yet they must be worked. And so I choose to come here to share my emotions and my journey with you, dear reader.

Thank you for caring enough to peruse these words. May you understand what I am choosing to share with you. Should you not, I thank you for taking the time to listen anyway to the ranting of a woman who loves to live with creative abandon.

In Light & Laughter & Loss,

Marcia

50,000 Words!!!

Hi Folks: As mentioned in a previous post, Marcia has been busy this month typing away at a (minimum) 50,000 word novel for Nanowrimo. As of 2:08 p.m. today, she reached her goal!! She’s not finished the book yet, and I’m sure she’ll have much more to add, but I’m so proud of her I had to share…

Love,
Mike.

Hug Certificates

Hi Folks:

Well, the results of the latest survey show that rampant hugging is sweeping the world!  Okay, so we made that part up, but there’s no doubting that hugs are good for you, non-fattening, and won’t cause cavities!

Because of this, a couple of years ago I had an idea to make up Hug Certificates.  I designed the original Hug Certificates using CorelDraw, and printed them out using standard business card stock.   They look like this:

front

back

We’ve given out Hug Certificates to people we’ve met hugging each other on the street, left Hug Certificates in books at the bookstore, on seats on the bus, on chairs in restaurants, and basically everywhere we go during our days.  And yes, we’ve also given them out in exchange for hugs we’ve received.  We’ve even mailed packets of Hug Certificates to friends in other places, so they can start their own hugging trends…  Recipients of Hug Certificates have returned smiles, laughter, happy tears, and more than one hug back to us.

So, in an effort to make hugging a truly global phenomenon, we’ve decided to put up a link to a Hug Certificate file so you can print out and give away your very own Hug Certificates!

Instructions are very simple:

1) Go to your local office supply store and purchase a set of blank business card stock pages.  These come on 8½ x 11″ sheets, 10 to a page, usually 300 in a package.  Each card is 2 x 3½”.

2) Click on this link: Hug Certificates to download the file.  This is a Microsoft Word file, suitable for any version of Word from 1997-2007, and I assume it will work with later Word versions as well.  It may work with other word processing software, but I haven’t tried it.  Open the file, and you should have a two-page document.  Print page 1 on one side of the business card stock, and page 2 on the back side.  See your printer guidelines on how to load the paper properly and how to print on both sides of the paper.  I find it easiest to print several copies of one side, reload the paper and then print the other side, but it depends on your printer.

3) Fold along the perforations (folding both ways helps it tear easier), and separate the cards into a stack.  Recycle the leftover bits and go out on your merry way, giving out certificates as you go!

_____

NB: (May 20, 2010) The new version of bit.ly shortened links allows us, the users to create custom links.  Therefore, we’ve replaced our old bit.ly link that links back to this page with a new one.  The new link is: http://bit.ly/HugCert The old bit.ly link still works and will lead here, but the new one is a lot easier to remember.  I’ve updated the back of the card (above) to show this, and also updated the downloadable Word template.  Also, we’ve decided that we each prefer slightly different wording for the backs of our Hug Certificates, so the template now shows five of each style.  Feel free to edit the back of the template once you’ve downloaded it to reflect your own preferences, but we’d appreciate it if you’d leave the bit.ly link attached.

Update: After seven years of hugging, in 2016 we had to make new Free Hugs posters (see below for our first Free Hugs campaign in 2010). All you need to make a poster is a pen or marker and a stiff piece of cardboard, but if you’d like the template we used to make ours, you can find it here: New Posters: For the Love of Hugs As of June, 2019, we’ve shared hugs with Ambassadors from (at least) 84 countries!! 🙂
_____

And be sure to check out Marcia’s page: Marcia’s Meanderings – Ladybugs and FREE HUGS! for information on our own ‘Free Hugs’ campaign to celebrate the anniversary of our engagement.  More images are available here.  Also visit our post on International Free Hugs Day 2011!!

Know anyone who’s looking for a really Big Bear Hug?

Hugs,
M&M.

P.S.  Every time you give or receive any Hug Certificates, or if you find one somewhere, we’d love it if you would leave us a comment and share your experiences!


Update!

Free Hugs Campaign – Official Page (music by Sick Puppies.net )

and

Free Hugs Campaign continued….

The official site: Free Hugs Campaign
__________
Update: February 14, 2010

A man from Ohio (unofficially) broke the world record for the most number of hugs in 24 hours: 7,777!

More here: Hug record attempt over Valentine’s weekend

______________
P.S. II, the sequel:

There are a number of ‘Free Hugs’ videos available on YouTube – they’ll definitely bring a lift to your day. Here are a few examples, and from there you can find links to others:

And one from Vimeo: Hug Therapy – You can Change the World, One hug at a time…

_______
P.S… III!

Hug it Forward is “a movement to inspire people everywhere to live their passion while giving back to make a lasting change in the world.”  Click the link to see more!

__________
UPDATE May 2015

The Great Zen Buddhist Teacher Thich Nhat Hanh on How to Do “Hugging Meditation”

Remember to put all of yourself into it!!

Our Stories

By the way, for those who haven’t noticed yet, at the top of this page you’ll see a link called ‘Our Stories’.  Clicking on that will bring you two options, titled (you guessed it!), ‘Marcia’s Stories’ and ‘Mike’s Stories’.  There are some there now, and we’ll add to them as we get time.  Look for short stories, poems, musings, and other scattered thoughts…

M&M

P.S.  The scroll wheel on your mouse will get you down the list if it goes beyond the page you can see.  If you don’t have a scroll wheel on your mouse, get one!  All seriousness aside, you can use the down arrow on the keyboard as well.

Future Me

Good Morning!  I figured it was time I actually wrote something on here, and since this whole idea is rather new to me, I’m not entirely sure where to take it.  However, I thought maybe I’d outline some of the things you might expect to find here as time goes on.  Marcia and I have a number of different interests, among them (for me) are photography, writing, spirituality and environmental topics, so expect to see some entries along those lines.

One site I like to use with my writings is called ‘Future Me’ (http://www.futureme.org).  In a nutshell, you  create a post on their site and arrange to send the message to yourself in the future.  This isn’t a reminder service; the minimum posting date is 3 months, and the default is one year, but you can set it for years or even a few decades into the future.  You can either set it to be private, or viewable to the world.  On the day you’ve specified, your message arrives in your Inbox.  All of mine are private, but from time to time I do drop by to see what other people have shared.  Anyway, try it out for yourself!

Mike.

Count Your Sheep

Marcia’s Meanderings

Hello Dear Ones!  Marcia here.

Wherever it is on this beautiful globe that you call home, a warm welcome to you.  Thank you for stopping by!

This month of November is an exceptionally busy one for yours truly. As a registered contestant in the Nanowrimo competition – that’s the National Novel Writer’s Month – I’m to complete a minimum of a 50,000 word fictional novel – that’s 1667 words per day, every day during the month of November. What a challenging and joyous journey this has been and continues to be!

Currently I’m just over 42,000 words with 5 days left to complete the basic requirement. Does that mean I’ll have a book finished come November 30th? Not on your life! December is editing month. Everything I’ve completed by then, whether it is magnificent or simply awful, perfectly honed or grammatically ineffectual, or potentially there may be a section or two with horrific punctuation – however the story has unfolded by then, December’s the time I get to play with the flow, structure, formatting and tweaking of whatever I’ve recorded this month.

Even so, look for more of Marcia’s Meanderings on a regular basis come December. The skills I’ve gained from the dedication to this writing process have been invaluable for me. I’ll continue to use and fine tune those skills here on M&M’s Musings, hopefully, and intentionally, for your enjoyment.

Create a fabulous week for yourself! Mike will be posting regularly in the interim, and I’ll post more again after December 1st!

M

*

BTW: Here is a synopsis of my novel:

Title: The Power of Grace, Hope and Joy

Three women and their penultimate behind-the-scenes techie are about to venture into the world of seminar presentations on topics near and dear to their hearts – yet their hearts are testing them on the very topics they wish to teach.