Hello Dear Ones!
Ever have a day when your mind wanders when you should be focusing? I’ve been sitting here at the computer for a few hours now. Rather than writing this post, I’ve been playing scrabble games with my sisters on Facebook. When I had done all 23 games we share and with none left to do, I added new games. When I tired of that, I went to websites I’ve not looked at for a while. When all of those had been checked with nothing found there to inspire me as to any specific topic to write here, I went on to something else. Between all these different ‘things’ I was doing, I’d check back in to see if I had received any new e-mails and tweets.
What I wanted to do was to find something cool to discuss here in my Marcia’s Meanderings. Something creative and uplifting for your enjoyment or your consideration at least. Because this is a creative exercise/endeavour for me, I thought maybe writing some micropoetry for Twitter would help liven up my creative juices. I couldn’t even come up with a single haiku or senryu (definition & some of my own examples) or tanka (example) or even a basic four line poem! Now that is very rare for me!
I’m working on the 4th draft of a 60,000 word novel that I’ve written. The first four chapters are already completed. Yeah and good for me! Yet I have a deadline to meet in order to make the publishing date. I’ve not even opened the file today.
Finally I got up and picked up a book from my inspiration shelf. I did a ‘Richard Bach‘ technique by laying the book flat on its spine to let it pop open randomly. Usually I’m inspired by something that I read on those specific pages. Not today.
I’m feeling restless. There is a sense of something pending. Something within me is wanting to speak or to be heard. Maybe there is something about to happen in or around my life and I’m picking up the increasing energy vibes prior to its occurrence. I sense I could meditate, but something is keeping me from getting settled enough to even contemplate the silence, let alone to find it!
Ever watch an ant? It seems to wander from this place to that, crisscrossing its own path several times over, apparently traveling in a rather random fashion. No matter how hard you try to see a pattern, there is no visible logic to its actions till it finds a gem of an item to take back to the colony. Then it has a direct and specific path to follow. That’s how I’m feeling today. I’ve not yet found my ‘gem of an item’.
There are things I know I should do. There are things I know I could do. There are things I know I want to do. The want to‘s have been put on hold. The should do‘s offer no temptation. The could do‘s? Well, I could do them, but won’t likely!
At times like this, when even the Bach technique fails to inspire (very seldom does it ever fail me), I often lay down for a nap. I don’t dare. If I did, I have the feeling I’d sleep for a few hours. Maybe after I’m finished here, if I’m still inclined to do so when I’m done, I may lay myself down for some rest.
Since my commitment to write here on Mondays is a positive one, I am writing spontaneously without the least fore-knowing of what it is I want or care to share. Guess this in itself is the topic of today – me, wandering.
The thought came that hindsight might have me giggling at myself later tonight. Once the realization of what is happening within me reveals itself with a sparkling clarity – and it will! – I’ll have a better grasp on what is mulling around within me – wandering inside my head, my heart and my cells in search of … ? Since I have no purpose in my now, guess I won’t know the answer to that till later.
That nap is calling louder. Maybe my body just needs a rest – for purposes only my cells know at the deepest level of my being. My body is, after all, smarter than I am. If I had to take control of advising it what to do and how to do it, I’d have been dead years ago!
You know, I just had a brief glimmer of a cohesive and inspiring thought: maybe the wandering is the meditation – as long as I leave myself open to being aware and to receiving the gifts of my higher Self and from the Divine. Being open and receptive to guidance – that in itself is a good enough purpose for me. How about for you?
In Light and Laughter,
(Mike chuckled when he read this post. Then he said: “Hon, it really is even more than that … it’s writer’s block!”
Yes, indeed! That it is …!)